My Natural Birth Story
A Positive Hospital Birth Experience

I've finally got my natural birth story typed out. Between the feeds, changes, playtime, coos, and cries (while bouncing the bouncer with my foot a lot) I'm excited to share it with you. It was a day in early summer and I opened my eyes at 5:11 am. For the past 3 weeks, I’d laid awake every night from 3-5 am, having contractions that petered out with the sunrise. I breathed a sigh of relief at finally sleeping through the night, hoping this fake labor was gone for good.

But, didn’t take long. A contraction welled up peaked, and fell away. This one felt different from all the previous nights. It was not intense, but my whole body was experiencing it, not just my belly.

Laboring at Home

I reached out and felt Tank’s soft spaniel curls in my hand. He tried to help by sitting on my stomach. I discouraged that sweet gesture and got him settled next to me and we laid there quietly together as I timed 4 more contractions. 15 minutes apart, lasting over a minute. Wondering… Will we meet our girl today?

Quinn (who'd been struggling to sleep and moved out to the couch) came in around 6:30. Seeing me awake, he instantly knew something was up. My body had cried wolf enough times that I refused to believe I was in labor. But I had promised to keep my lifelong friend Sonja who was flying in from Minnesota for the birth in the loop. I messaged her a halfhearted update as I was getting up.

Timing Contractions & Grounding in the Garden

My contractions continued to be strong and long through breakfast. Around 8:00am Sonja decided to get on a plane and head to California. I was worried contractions would stop, and she would be here, away from her own little one waiting for my labor to return, but she knew it was time.

I went out to the garden to see if labor would progress through movement and distraction. Cleaning the Bermuda grass from the turmeric bed became my goal. Looking back, turmeric was the perfect plant to commune with while calling my baby earthside. Root herbs have strong, stable energies. They’re grounding and anti-inflammatory, inviting openness and offering safety.

Quinn came to check on me about an hour later and found me holding onto the shovel, breathing deeply through a contraction. At this point Contractions were still fairly mild. I was enjoying riding the waves, welcoming them, and talking to S. Welcoming her earthside and breathing deeply. Telling her how excited we were to meet her. At 10:00am, after 13 contractions in the garden, I went inside to rest.

Overthinking Labor: Is It Really Time?

My overthinking mind still wasn't convinced I was in labor. Over and over, I thought that if I decided it was labor, it would go away. Resting inside cooled out the contractions for a bit. There was nothing for 30 minutes, and I thought, Well, that's that. S is not coming today. But when they came back, around 10:45, they came back long and strong.

I was no longer able to welcome the contractions to grow and build. Pain had joined the party, and I was starting my dance with her. With each contraction, I felt deeply into my vertical core. I’ve been studying and integrating The Art of Feminine Presence® for three years. A set of energetic practices that call you down into your body's power.

The vertical core is a connection of the body’s three energy centers: the brain, heart, & dantian. When you activate your vertical core, it becomes a pillar of strength down the center of your body, regulating your nervous system, grounding your energy, and calling forward the most powerful version of yourself.

Managing Pain and Resting: Preparing for Active Labor

From my vertical core, I was able to receive the contractions instead of resist them. Inviting S to continue her journey down and out. I focused on my breath, reminding myself that the pain was just my body doing its thing. Focusing on deep relaxation through each contraction lessened the pain immensely.

At 11:00am, I suddenly needed to fuel up. My body knew this would be my last meal before delivery. I craved something hearty, so I got some lasagna out of the freezer. It took about 30 minutes to eat as contractions forced me to pause, breathe, and then rest.

Tank, who had been supportive and sweet and by my side every moment, couldn’t let this opportunity pass. He jumped all over my lasagna when I left it unattended. Quinn heard the commotion and ran to my rescue. We laughed at our silly old dog who is always reliably naughty at the worst times.

Labor Intensifies Laughter Helps

By 11:30am, contractions were 12 minutes apart and lasting nearly 2 minutes. Quinn stopped working and alternated between sitting with me and running about making sure the homestead was ready for our absence.

I labored from the couch. Breathing, resting, looking out the window at the overgrown front garden, marveling at the abundance S was arriving into.

At 1:30, I remember jokingly messaging Sonja: “This better be labor because it's too uncomfortable for there to be something else that's real labor coming later!” The pain-relieving power of humor is immense. I leaned on it heavily throughout giving birth.

Coping with Labor Pain

At 2:00pm, I decided to take a shower and braid my hair. The shower felt wonderful. Contractions were 7 minutes or so apart at that point and quite intense. The water on my back offered sweet relief, and I rolled through 5 contractions, swaying back and forth under it.

Knowing that the hair braiding was going to be more difficult as labor progressed, I hopped out. I was right. Having contractions while holding the braids in place and remembering which strand came next shook my ability to stay in my vertical core.

I closed my eyes and drew myself down, staying in my body and refusing to rush. From here on out, the contractions commanded all of my attention. No more talking or doing anything through them.

The pressure between my legs was strong, and I didn’t want to be seated at all. I was walking, leaning over my ball, swaying back and forth to keep my body relaxed. At 3:00pm I went back to the couch, riding contractions on all fours and lying down and relaxing every muscle in my body between.

Preparing for the Hospital: Final Hours at Home

By 5:00pm, contractions were six minutes apart. Bags were packed, pets were all set, and we were ready to go to the hospital whenever I decided I was ready. Quinn was making dinner but came to sit with me every time I had a contraction.

He did a really lovely job holding the space as I labored. Laughing with me when I needed it, sitting quietly otherwise. Sonja landed in Sacramento at 5:00pm contractions moved from 6 minutes apart to 5 in the time it took for her to arrive on our doorstep.

Laboring with Support

Quinn ate dinner, and I ate a single tortellini noodle and a brown butter chocolate chip cookie. Highly recommend having a batch of those on hand for labor. Sonja walked into the living room as I was swaying through a contraction. She immediately got in there and put counterpressure on my hips. I didn't even realize how bad my back labor was until I felt the relief.

Remaining in my vertical core took far less energy with this support. Thoughts of “Why did I decide to go natural?” “Am I going to be able to do this?” and “I just want this to stop” had come up from time to time throughout the day. I was able to observe them as they went by instead of owning them in my body.

The pain would have been 10x worse if I got stuck in negative thoughts. Returning to my mantra of “rest, relax, and receive your baby” with every unhelpful thought while feeling my energy centers whirling up and dissipating tension offered immediate relief.

Managing Pain on the Way to the Hospital

Sonja suggested squeezing a comb during contractions in the car on the way to the hospital, and it helped, but it was still the most painful part of my labor. Quinn and Sonja did an awesome job keeping me laughing to ease the tension in my body.

I had 7 one-minute and 30-second contractions on the drive. I leaped out of the car as Quinn pulled up to the hospital entrance. Everyone we saw offered me a wheelchair, and I said, “No, thank you!” It felt incredible to move again.

Transition to Active Labor

The front desk waved us right through, and I had a contraction in the lobby in front of the cafeteria. I was vocalizing through them at this point, low, long moans helping me breathe. Every woman in the lobby who had ever birthed a baby turned towards me and cheered me on. The support of the mom collective was deeply felt.

Sonja and I got to L&D around 8:00 pm. I smashed my finger into what I thought was the doorbell, trying to get in before another contraction hit. Turns out I was aggressively poking the camera lens instead of the button. We walked into the lobby in a fit of giggles at my mistake.

The receptionist asked us why we were there. “We're having a baby!” At this point, the contraction app told me that I had 101 contractions. Most of them lasted longer than a minute. I was confident I was going to be at least 6 cm dilated. I’d been working my ass off for 15 hours and I was sure major progress had been made.

Quinn caught up with us from parking the car just in time to tag along as our triage nurse brought me back and put S and I on the monitors. When she checked my cervix, I was only at 3 centimeters. That information would have been devastating without all of my tools in place.

I took a pause, reminded myself that dilation is just a moment in time and that things can change quickly, and returned to my vertical core. “From this place, I can keep going as long as I need to.” My nurse must have seen my face because she studied the monitor and said, “You’re definitely laboring. Your contractions are strong, and you’re going to progress quickly.”

They called the doctor who would deliver S to triage to meet us. I've always had a deep distrust of male providers. I really did not want one for my birth. Months earlier I'd looked on the hospital website, and only 1 of the 20 or so possible doctors was male. I asked the Universe to send me the perfect person, obviously a woman.

Meeting My Doctor: A Shift in Trust

My manifestation came through beautifully. But as usual, not in the way I imagined it. A male provider entered the room, and I felt distrust and tension rise in my body. “Don’t make assumptions. Give the man a chance.”

I am SO glad I did. Dr. Cornish was so kind, and his use of informed consent was flawless. I felt totally in control under his care. He grabbed the ultrasound wand to check that S was still head down. We saw an adorable ear on the screen. It looked just like mine!

Dr. Cornish told us that they couldn’t get me a room until I was 4 cm, but we were close to meeting our baby. Quinn and I looked at each other - big excitement and energy shared between us. It was finally real. This was happening.

There was only room for one support person in triage, so Sonja and Quinn switched out until my hour on the monitors was done. I got into a hospital gown and we all went for a walk. Every time I had a contraction, I leaned on the walls and swayed or squatted and moaned while Quinn or Sonja jumped in and provided counter pressure on my hips.

My vertical core was my lifeline at this point. These contractions were strong and painful. Any time my body held tension, the pain intensified tenfold. I continued the work of staying relaxed, breathing, and calling on the power of my vertical core.

Intense Contractions: Emotional and Physical Support

Quinn was starting to worry for me at this point. He could tell my pain level was getting higher, and his support was turning into sympathy. I told him I did not have the capacity for pity. I needed him to cheer me on and tell me that he had unshakable faith in my ability to get this done.

In that moment, I was really thankful that Sonja was there because she had experienced a natural birth and knew what support I needed. After seeing her and my nurse cheering me on, Quinn caught on and did great from then on out.

We walked the ward three times. There was a very sweet-looking, well put together couple sitting in the waiting room, staring wide-eyed at me. This a frizzy-haired feral woman clutching a chair in the middle of the waiting room, groaning through contractions like a wild animal. I was not in a headspace to care.

Progress and Patience

Around 10:00pm the need to rest again came over me again. Sonja and I went back to my bed in triage. I had a few contractions lying on my side in the tiny bed, my belly hanging off the side. The rest I was getting between contractions was worth the discomfort of the bed.

My nurse checked me again, and I was 5.5 centimeters. We were getting a room! Sonja went out and updated Quinn, and he started gathering all our bags we'd strewn all over the lobby.

My nurse got my IV started and pulled some blood. She was apologizing to me for the needle sticks. I remember thinking, “Lady, I’m birthing a baby. I am not noticing needle sticks right now. I’m busy staying relaxed and strong in my vertical core.”

Transition: Feeling the Urge to Push

It was around 10:15 at this point. I was ready to go, just waiting for my room to be ready, having intense contractions and flopping and resting between each one. Then, I had one that felt different.

My body started spontaneously pushing a little. I turned to Sonja, wide-eyed, and grunted, PUSHING! The triage nurse heard me, beelined it into our room, and checked me again. I was at 9 cm. We needed this room now.

My delivery nurse showed up within minutes. I remember the triage nurse telling my delivery nurse that I was coping fantastically. I wasn't coping, I was in it, I was it, I was doing it.

I had a huge contraction against the door frame of the triage room as we were leaving and another small one as I was getting into bed in my room. Dr. Cornish came back and checked me, and my waters were bulging so he broke them. By 11:00 pm, I was complete, and it was pushing time.

The Final Chapter of My Natural Birth Story

Up until this point, I was on intermittent monitoring and no fluids at all. When I started to push, S’s heart rate dropped into the 50s. My nurse got the fluids running wide open, and they asked me to get up on my knees. I was exhausted, and my fear was making the pain more intense. I didn't know if I was going to be able to move until the contraction was over, but I did it. S was in trouble, and nothing else mattered. Strength came out of nowhere, and I was up on all fours in an instant.

I realized in that moment that I could do anything she needed me to do. Whatever was required of me, I would do to get her out safely. Thankfully, she recovered as soon as I got up. I tried out a bunch of different positions for pushing. Made some progress on all fours, but it stalled out. Tried side-lying with the peanut ball. No go.

My nurse was incredibly helpful at this point helping me move and telling me when I was wasting my energy or making progress. We tried putting the bar up on the bed so that I could squat and push, but my legs were too tired to hold me up at that point. With all the walking and having been in labor 18 hours at that point, I was spent.

Pushing on My Back

I finally decided to push on my back with my legs and the stirrups like I swore I would never do, and that was the right position for me. I could totally flop between contractions. Quinn and Sonja later told me the contractions were spaced out to about five minutes apart, and I was falling asleep between them. I had no idea. I was just in the zone, in my mental and physical power, bringing my baby into the world.

It was really go time now. The resident and attending came in and introduced themselves, and everyone in the room was counting off my pushes. I didn't want to hold my breath while pushing, but I didn't make much progress without doing so.

The Moment She Arrived

If I ever have another natural birth, I want to figure out how to push productively while still breathing, but at this point in the process I was exhausted and ready to hold my baby. If holding my breath got her out faster, I was going to do it. With Sonja and Quinn each holding a leg to help me into a deep squat, and me pushing with all my might, we were getting the job done.

Poor S spent about an hour stuck in my pelvis, but she eventually found her way down. She wasn't quite making it out with my pushes, and her heart rate started dropping again. I think a more experienced doctor wouldn't have panicked, but the resident in charge of Dr. Cornish got super nervous for S and said that if she wasn't out on the next push, they were going to use a vacuum. They also called a NICU team to be on standby.

Quinn and Sonja said they knew from the look on my face that no vacuum was going to be needed. The resident was trying to tell me the risks of the vacuum and get consent and whatever, but I was not listening. I was summoning a massive contraction with my mind. I was preparing to get my baby here now. I'd come too far and healed too much generational trauma to not get the birth I wanted.

Our nurse told Quinn to turn on some music, and I asked for my meditation playlist. S was born to “I Release Control” by Alexia Sunshine Rose.

I was in my vertical core like I never had been before, bringing a healthy baby up to my chest on my terms right now. I turned to Sonja and Quinn and said, “Here we go, team.” They grabbed my legs and pulled them back, and I pushed two huge pushes. Quinn said I turned blue, and he was worried I was going to pass out, but suddenly I saw her and felt her warm and wet against my chest. She was a little blue too, but cried right away. She had a huge cone head, and she was beautiful and perfect.

The Golden Hour

Quinn did a happy dance when he saw her emerge. Relief, joy, and excitement flooded his body. His girls were both strong, healthy, safe, and sound. He and Sonja surrounded the bed, and we just ogled her for the golden hour. She was so soft. Her energy was so sweet. She cried a bit, but calmed easily.

Instead of spending her first month of life fighting to survive in an incubator in the NICU like both I and my mother, S never left my side. Her birth was everything I wanted, perfectly manifest and contained.